My boys are back! And my mood is so much better now. I’m so happy to have my house full again…full of laughter, full of sweet hugs & kisses, full of…kids.
And not even my stupid-ass IX can ruin it. Despite his efforts a little earlier. He called me.
“How are you doing?”
“I just wanted to check on you after you seemed so despondent this morning when I dropped the boys off.” [And kudos to him for using such a big word...and even halfway correctly!]
“No, I’m OK now. I just didn’t have the best Thanksgiving.”
“OK then. So…”
Excruciatingly long pause.
“So….I just wanted to gauge where you are about the boys. I was thinking it might be better if I had them full-time.”
“I was just thinking I might be able to offer a more stable environment for them.”
“Yeah…with two parents.”
I shit you not…that’s what he said. What an effing moron. I went off on him.
“You left us to be with her. She is your mistress. She will always be your mistress. She is not their mother. She could never be their mother. I am their one and only mother. Don’t ever refer to her as any sort of a mother to them. Are you going to pursue this in the court?”
“No, not now. I don’t have any money to do that.”
“Why are you doing this? Haven’t you destroyed enough of me already?”
“I just want to be a full-time dad. I want to be involved more in the lives of my sons.”
“Well, you had that opportunity, and you walked away.”
“Well, when [the RK] is 13, the court will listen to where he wants to live.”
“Not with that as the only factor, it won’t.”
“I just think I could offer them a more stable life, that’s all.”
Who’s to say their life already isn’t stable? We have a home, in a safe neighborhood, the RK has friends, he goes to a good school. He goes to bed with a full belly every night, in a house that isn’t in danger of having the electricity turned off or us being evicted.
I ask the RK if his dad has been talking about this with him. He says, “Yeah, in a couple of years.”
Who the hell does he think he is?
So of course, I feel like I have to discuss it with the RK as well. Lord knows what kind of shit the IX is filling the RK’s head with…I feel I have to do whatever I can to counteract that.
Oh…and then there was the part of this phone conversation with the IX where he brought the child support he pays into it. He says “he” pays the mortgage. No, I tell him, you pay child and spousal support. I pay the mortgage. I’m the one that sends the check in. Then he counters with: but you wouldn’t be able to pay it without those child support payments I make.
No, but I wouldn’t be able to pay it without my own income, either.
Where in the hell does he get off saying his child support payments are earmarked specifically to pay the mortgage? Why not our other bills…like heat, water, electricity, etc.? What a jackass. The court orders him to pay that child support…what I do with it is at my discretion. And yes, I use his payments, along with my own income, to pay the mortgage.
And all of our other bills as well.
I asked him a long time before all that if he was doing this for financial reasons, and of course he said no. But later on in the conversation when he played that ridiculous and completely unfounded child support card, and along with all of his own well-documented financial woes as of late, I’d beg to differ.
[Ed. note: There are two separate links above...one is attached to the words 'well-documented' and the other is 'financial woes'.]
I have to admit, though, I’m scared. I have got to find a way to get out from under his thumb, financially speaking. The way it’s set up now, the only way he can stop his child support payments is if he loses his job. And surely he’s not stupid enough….no….he can’t be. God, please don’t let him prove me wrong!
Stupid, selfish, sorry excuse for a father.