The past week has been such a blur I’ve been so busy. And then exhausted. And then busy again. My sleep quota hasn’t been met in quite a while, and I’m sincerely looking forward to having some time off this weekend from mommyhood to catch up.
So whatever it was I was going to write about for my part II I’ve forgotten. I do remember I was going to comment on the incredible, thrilling, nail-biting Fiesta Bowl that My Boys (not ‘my boys’ as in my offspring) played against Ohio State in. That game was just about as exciting as the game against Texas Tech, with a definitely much better result. 24-21! Yeah! Hook ’em!
I’m not a big New Year’s resolution person, but this year, I have the mindset of making sure 2009 is much different than 2008. I’m not resolving to do anything that specific; just that I’m going to be in a very different place one year from now. I’m not going to let myself wallow in the misery and self-pity I inflict on myself for what little progress I make in my self-betterment. Progress is the name of the game. I’m learning how to let go of those things that aren’t worthy of the stress and anxiety I let consume me, and I’m starting to understand that I’ve become a pro at making mountains out of molehills. I have learned to let go of the idea that I can have my house entirely clean at any given moment, but I’m still steadily working to get my house to a higher level of everyday cleanliness and organization. I’m also embracing the fact that this will start to fix itself somewhat as the IB matures as well.
I have some serious digging out to do. For probably the first year after the IX moved out, I did nothing. I did just enough to make sure my boys were taken care of, and that was all the energy I could muster for so many days on end. Now that I’m functioning at a much higher level physically and mentally, I’ve got some making up for lost time to do. I have lots of ‘de-IX-ing’ to do in this house. His shit’s got to go. Plus there’s always the general cleaning out and organizing to do.
Fresh start. Everday is a fresh start for me. Slow and steady wins the race. Rome wasn’t built in a day. You get the point.
I’m also hellbent on slappin’ some color up on these walls. Sometime this year. This place looks so barren and sterile right now. It needs a few touches of Trish.
Facebook is an amazing thing. I’m in awe of the contacts I’ve reestablished. It’s so cool how I have a list of 78 friends (at the moment) from every era of my life. Childhood, high school, college, my neighbors, my coworkers, a few I only know over the internet…
…and then there’s my fluting friends. Before moving out to Ann Arbor, I played in a flute choir for five years or so. I have reconnected with quite a few of those people (one being my totally awesome gay friend that I rang in the New Year with), and another who just happens to be the section leader of the flute section in my local community band. That rehearses at the high school right down the road. I friended her on FB, sent her a message that I was ready, and…
…tonight I went to my first rehearsal! And it was AWESOME! I am totally in my element sitting in a concert band. I love getting out my new, beautiful and very expensive professional-grade flute and feeling the metal gradually warm in my fingers as my breath flows through it. And I love contributing to the creation of beautiful, soul-touching music. I love working in unison towards that goal. I love being a part of such a team where each member has the same goal. It rocks. And I did it tonight. And I’m going to keep doing it, no matter what it takes.
While I was off feeding my soul, one of my co-workers who is a mere 22 years of age and used to be a nanny came and stayed with the boys for me. She’s relatively new at work, and this is her first job. She grew up across the state, and this is her first venture out into the real world and away from her family. She talks about how lonely she gets (although her boyfriend made the move with her…he’s in med school at UM), and how this whole real-world experience can be quite scary. I fed her a home-cooked meal which she said she hadn’t had in so long, and she expressed to me how good it felt to be in a home. The IB threw his usual fit at bedtime, apparently even calling, “Mommy! Mommy!”, but he eventually went to sleep and all was well. I told N not to feel bad about that, that he calls out for Daddy or the RK whenever I’m not going along with his every little desire. Little stinker.
I found out that the RK ended up heading upstairs to do homework and read his book. WHHAA? He got ready for bed all on his own, and even though he had my permission to stay up until I got home around 9:30, I found him all snuggled up in his bed, sound asleep. N filled me in on what a big help he was with the RK, helping to settle him down for the night, etc. Those boys amaze me. It overwhelms me to see how blessed I am. I am one incredibly lucky mama.
Today ended up being a great day. It was a big milestone for my ‘resolution’ for this year. I’m on my way.
I promise I won’t let my blog be so neglected again. The first half of my day was decidedly less fantastic, thanks to that IX of mine. He pulled a doozy, for sure. I’ll spill all the gory details next time.